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Despair is all that one has to carry;
When anyone can't let go and forgive another their transgressions/life's learning lessons of wrong choice decisions.
For each and everyone of us have made wrong choice decisions...can I get an Amen out there?
Dear All One Family:
Tonight I allowed myself the time-out to watch "48 Hours Mystery Show." It was quite an interesting journey into forgiveness and one that I saw my dad also take with both my brothers that had found themselves imprisoned.
So again dear all one family members, I am a lost in yesterday a remembering my dad and seeing quite a similarity to the Mr. Whitaker, a man that lost his wife, youngest son, in a attack on all 3 members of his family and himself.
An attack that was orchestrated by his oldest son; Bart Whitaker. The reason being greed from the thoughts of a 1.5 Million dollar insurance policy.
Now this father's oldest son is facing the death penalty, this man's last relative from a night that should have been perfect, yet had the ear marks of total devastation...all within a blink of an eye...the place this took place? Sugarland, Texas.
Yet this father who knows that several plots against his life, his wife, and youngest son, all based on greed from a son that even though given quite a well endowed/financially privileged childhood, somehow grew up believing that his parents only loved him on condition that he perform at their high standards of perfection.
A standard he stated he couldn't maintain and pretended to be a graduating from college that year, yet the college showed that he had only attended the first year of their 4 year school.
This father a knowing all this current information from the trial hearing on "capital murder charges for his wife, and his youngest son," still pleaded with the court to not sentence his son to death, yet only give a life sentence; thus he still could have his son in a physical presence.
A son as Bart's father states, "knows that his son is sorry for his actions and has changed."
A father perhaps like my own, who knows that while his sons were a growing up, he was caught busy trying to provide for them in the only way he had been shown to raise them, for Bart did state that love was never handed him by his parents, only money and gifts...hmmmm...
The DA called Bart a sociopath personality...yet was he really? Or was he another victim of "Absence Fathers, Lost Sons," with myself adding to that book's title, "Absence Parents, Lost Children."
What deems a parent absent? One that takes for granted that tomorrow, lots can happen when you are found asleep...
Time marches on, taking the time to tell your kids that they are everything to you and how very proud you are of them...and telling them that they can fly one day if they choose to...yet only have to walk the path of good intentions towards all, and have faith, trust and belief that God is real and is alive...
Tell them also that God loves them unconditionally, all they have to do is to say that they are sorry and mean it, He will forgive them. This Mr. Whitaker, told the court room all of this as well.
My thoughts on the subject should be already present in your mind and if not, here goes my long winded version of it...I believe this as well. Mr. Whitaker is absolutely right..."no one has the right to judge another." "Only God."
I believe a life sentence for this very young man...would not only give his father additional hope and time to insure his only remaining son/family, with his visits and letters, would help insure that his son is able to find his way Home, where his mom and brother are now residing...until dad follows, and I believe that perhaps won't be long either...even though he is still a very young man himself and perhaps my age, in my mid fifties.
What would take Mr. Whitaker Home sooner? The same things that it took my daddy Home as well...the thoughts of a life lived without my mom, his soul mate.
Mr. Whitaker is a good man. One I can see my dad in...Remember something else about this case. Even though today Mr. Whitaker is seen as a very devout Christian, no one knows what kind of life he gave his children in their days without God a leading the way in the home.
So will I judge the man named, Bart Whitaker? Not I, for only God has that ability...all I can do is insure that I have all my own "t's. crossed and my I's dotted," if you know what I mean?
All can call Bart Whitaker what ever they want to call him...a manipulator, a liar, a thief and a killer... I choose to call him an asleep young man...
Bart also had three good friends that also came from affluent backgrounds and they all three considered helping him...was it simply due to sympathy being he was supposed to be a walking down the graduation ceremony aisle and wouldn't be able to, and perhaps knowing how their parents would handle that deception were the shoes on their own feet...so perhaps these kids as well, were raised with the attitude that success is all that matters and saving face.
I know that is how it was in my father's viewing of us kids, perhaps the same is true here... Don't tell me, show me. And God please, don't show your flaws to my neighbors, for I am only trying to show them my successes, not failures.
Trust me, I am not a whining or a complaining. My father did the very best job that he could do with the amount of training and insights from others close to him, which really didn't number a lot for he was a rather closed off man, and rarely allowed anyone a close look through...
I was only allowed rare moments to get close to my father...for he was always too busy for anything but a securing his future and that to him was his show of love...the letters that he gave my two imprisoned brothers, was more than he ever gave me until my Christmas before last...letter and that letter to me, is worth millions...even though again, not a lot of words, yet enough to make it matter to me...
Bart told the court room that the time his dad gave him while he has been in prison, has already changed the way that he viewed him in the past. That told me lots, for I feel that both my former imprisoned brothers, have a part of our dad, that I don't, and I am grateful that they carry those precious treasures of words, that dad didn't give all of his children freely.
So perhaps there is something to this thing that bad behavior is a single for help...for even bad bahvior and the attention it gathers, is better than no attention at all? Wow, those are some pretty astounding thoughts I am a having tonight.
I guess I am a missing my dad tonight, for when I heard Mr. Whitaker a pleading for his son not to be killed...I saw my dad, myself a doing the same thing.
Wow, powerful night tonight for me. All things happen for a reason. I believe that most conclusively.
I will be a putting Mr. Whitaker and his son on my large pile of loved ones...on God's Altar for prayers...I wish Mr. Whitaker, all the time that God will allow for him to be with his son. Be Blessed Each and Everyone.
I think that I will close for now...for I just want to think about happy thoughts about my daddy now...and I know that he knows my love and lonliness without him in my life...yet I do know that one day I will see him and mom and all of my loved ones that have graduated before me...
To all a very good and special night...
Be Blessed
Love, Light and Peace
Tonie
Rev. Tonie C. Wallace Dream-Founder and Director
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