Thought Reflections Shared With Guardian Ad Liteum Volunteer That Demonstrated That A Job Done For God Is More Valuable Than One That Isn't

Spiritual Ministries Mind Spirit Body Vibrational Medicine Research, Healing and Education Center.
July 11, 2009
Not Wanting To Live Any Longer In An Area That Doesn't Honor The Christ In All Of God's Children
Rev. Tonie C. Wallace Dream-Founder and Director
Jada Stone Associate Director/Contributing Writer

Dear All One Family:

When I talked by phone to the Guardian Ad Liteum court appointed volunteer worker assigned to my adopted daughter's case...V.H. right after I got home...from that disastrous day...and heard about all of the plots and plans to destroy the only real parent of her two court appointed case minors...and how not one single attorney involved in the case along with the DA had a full knowledge about what evidence was present in this case that showed quite conclusively that the man named the rapist in it, the evidence presented didn't support that conclusion...

Last month her court appointed report was more or less never held up for review...by any of the legal teams for both sides...almost as if it didn't hold any relevance, because it didn't support the take down they were a plotting...

I watched as she sat down with each and everyone involved and saw her point to this and that fact and put it all in their faces...most of all, the face of my adopted daughter's attorney...and then the DA and the DSSI worker and her supervisor...

Each time I saw her leave each one a shaking her head and talking to herself...

I asked her after she told me of all the deceptive things that those responsible for making large changes in my adopted daughter and her husband life, were a trying to do unjustly...

I asked her, how old she was? She told me 38 years old. I asked her, do you have any children of which she stated three kids and My oldest son is getting ready to be deployed to Afghanistan...soon, she said sadly yet proudly!

I asked her about the subject of lying...had she as well, had a problem with any of her children when they were little about telling lies?

She said of course haven't we all? I also told her that I knew my kids so well that I could tell more times than not when they were a lying...and asked her if she had the same magical power and she said yes...Mothers always seem to know that which our children daddies seemed to not...or understand.

I told her that for almost ten years of my adopted daughter's little girl life, she wasn't in her daddy's life not because her momma didn't try to arrange to happen even when he refused to pay child support for them since they separated and divorced...

So unbeknown st to V.H., the court appointed Guardian Ad Liteum volunteer...my adopted daughter was the primary and single parent for all three of her children...two by the former husband a putting together this case while being given temporary custody of their daughter since the time that my adopted daughter asked her daughter shortly after the allegations were filed...

She asked her daughter had this in fact gone down for the last time allegations were made by her little girl, it caused a flurry of trouble with DSSI and her dad and his family members...and when she got the truth out of her little girl who was then about 8 years old...and had stated that her step daddy touched her boobies...and really later was discovered that he hadn't...


When my adopted daughter asked her little girl as to the reason that she found it necessary to tell such a terrible lie and she stated that she didn't like her mommy gone to work so much of the time and she felt that if she told this lie on her step daddy that maybe mommy would quit work and stay at home with her...and her little brother that missed her greatly!

I also told V.H. that up until the time that this storm fall out, her daughter was a calling her mother several times a day while mom was at work, just to hear her voice and talk about the things she was a doing...so this little girl didn't have a large misunderstanding or problem come down between her and mommy and that is why she felt it necessary to tell her daddy and step mother about that which she couldn't tell her mom herself...

This little girl is attention deficit, meaning this child craves attention and it doesn't matter how much grieve it causes others, for even bad attention is a better than none at all...

Besides my adopted daughter's former husband and father of her two children...is disabled and a stay at home daddy and being he is more boy than man, he is your non typical dad, for like Michael Jackson, something happened to him when he was a growing up that prevented him from having a good childhood and now is when he is a making up for lost time ...so who wouldn't choose a parent that will play all the games that you want and give you all the undivided attention that your mommy couldn't for she was a working and too tired to play all day and all night...and work as well...

A single mother of three a working too many hours because of low hourly pay,because the state gave very little support to those single parents that could work and didn't...so her working is what caused the separation between mother and daughter...and that is exactly what my adopted daughter's court appointed attorney used in his description to her in a conference closed to only her and all the other legal teams a wanting to cook her...for good.

The Plea Bargain of Neglect was according to her legal Representative...her court appointed attorney...He told her,according to my adopted daughter, that by her accepting the plea bargain of admitting neglect, that she was in fact admitting that when her daughter alleged the incident had occurred her mother was at work and being the juvenile court system doesn't have to have proof of who did it, only 49.99% of the probability that something had happened in order to gain a guilty verdict...

"So by her a taking the neglect plea bargain, she wouldn't have to worry about further prosecution no matter the outcome of her husband's criminal guilty findings."

I told my adopted daughter why hadn't she told her attorney and all of the other buzzards a hovering over her a trying to pick her apart and drive her in to lying on her husband in order to save her children from being taken from her for good.

I told my adopted daughter that I haven't heard of so much crap in my whole life, for what he had told her concerning this plea bargain of his was that he was a offering her; would make all parents responsible for the actions of the other...when the other had to go to work...and I just don't believe that our judicial system would allow such ignorant responsibility shared convictions to be allowed and if such, all I can say is this, I might not ever marry again for it is too risky taking on the full responsibility of knowing before I married the man if he was pervert or not...

For I am now wondering what happened to the woman that was married to the very sick man that she had married to for thirty plus years and how she stated how happy that she had been together all those years and how they had a good marriage in the good and bad times as well and he never showed her any other sign that he wasn't what he appeared to be all those years together...until the day the police came a knocking with a warrant for his arrest for having killed over 25 women in the period of time that they were married together...

I am now wondering, if she had to share in his serial killing action the responsibility of his crime, even if she didn't know?

When this all came down to my adopted daughter, I already told you that the first time that she asked her daughter, all the past signs of lying were present and what my adopted daughter generally did was to test that body language signal of her kids at least two times...

My adopted daughter was never allowed to see or talk to her daughter about the case since the first time...and because of that, she is going on her daughter's first and only reaction time a coming out positive for lying...

When my adopted daughter interrogated her husband about the charges of touching her daughter he stated that he hadn't and would never have done that kind of thing to his and her kids...for he loved them and her too much to.

My adopted daughter told me that he told her that he would do anything that she wanted him to do to prove his innocence...a lie detector test...moving out until it was all settled and he was found innocent...

My adopted daughter told him to stay in their home and she would move in with her dad so that she could be close to her youngest son and oldest son and keep DSSI off of their backs for she was ordered to throw the only man that ever showed her love, her whole life, out in the streets...so instead she allowed him to stay and she move out and in with her dad and two sons...until her husband got arrested and jailed the first week of December 2008.

So since August until 4 months ago when my adopted daughter's favorite and close uncle got so ill that Hospice had to be called in, she was a living with her dad...so when DSSI decided due to her daughter's latest version of her story that included a Jerry Springer kind of scenario play out, where her youngest son was not allowed to see his mommy without DSSI supervision, once a week for an hour...

My adopted daughter then moved in with the only remaining family member of her mother, her mother's sister to help her with her failing husband, her favorite uncle that knew she wasn't the black sheep that her dad's family made her out to be since her mommy died and couldn't protect her any longer against the over critical eyes and mouth of her dad's family who were a getting their information from her daddy who as well, has attention deficit problems and just needed to vent his thoughts a believing like his own father who showed him the way as well...that by first putting in the complaints that he had, they would all somehow feel sorry and sympathetic for him, and needed advice because he didn't have a clue as to how to raise two kids alone, for his own dad had been missing in action when he and his siblings were a growing up, so the grumbling he did every time he and his kids went to battle, had a two edge sword purpose...assistance with advice and it allowed him to get it off of his chest...

One of the advices of his siblings that I know for a fact went down concerning my adopted daughter's father was that he stop doing so much had made for herself...

So that is exactly what he did for that is what my adopted daughter's father's family is all about...listening to each other family member and taking their sides even if it isn't a wise decision, it is one that the family felt appropriate...and if anyone says anything to another family member that hurts that family members feelings, you have the whole family to go to battle with...

So after my adopted daughter's father's siblings told him that he was a ruining his daughter by being too accommodating to her when ever she needed him, he started to not help her when she needed it and complained about doing anything for her...simply because his family believed he was a spoiling her by being too loving or too giving...and she wasn't appreciating anything he was a doing for her or she wouldn't be so resistant to be what he told her she needed to be.

When I heard my adopted mother tell me that my adopted daughter was spoiled and that was her largest problem...

I have always had an objection when ever my adopted mother spoke of her grand daughter in such terms as spoiled.

I told her that first of all, a spoiled child wouldn't work as hard as she does to keep a roof over her head and her children that she brought into this world of pain, suffering and sorrow...

A spoiled child wouldn't keep a keeping on when all around her told her she had no worth or value...

A spoiled child would not have worked yet have others do the work for him or her and keep all of the profits...

A spoiled child wouldn't care what you thought of them, for being spoiled, the world belongs to them and them alone...and it doesn't matter how many bodies they have to step over and on to obtain all the things that the world owes them.

A spoiled selfish child, wouldn't have had any children for the world is all about them and they aren't going to share it with anyone.

Were a spoiled selfish child to have children, they would send them off to someone else, gladly! Not fight for them to be returned!

So as all the other times I didn't agree with her opinions of that which I could see more obvious than herself...she would get upset that I didn't agree with her and act in the manner that she wanted me to do, even in matters concerning her son that I had been dating long term...

So with my adopted mother, we only battled when I differed on her opinions set in stone...which would usually be followed by a angry call from my more times than not, my back and forth boyfriend...her son... a wondering why I keep harassing his mother and how if I didn't stop, his older sister would handle it...yet what his mother didn't tell him that sometimes we would spend 6-7 hours on the phone a trying to get her to let go of the past so that she could move into the present moment or die...

On several occasions, friends of my moon, stars and heaven, would tell me that the greatest complaint that their buddy, my on again, off again boyfriend...had about me is that I talked too much with his momma and he didn't personally like the things I was a saying to her and all of it was getting back to him for his momma had a big mouth and told things that only she has the memory of and many are a wondering if she isn't a losing her mind...

For that is the reason that their dad told his kids that was why he got rid of her sorry ass...for she told him crazy things all of the time...and she was a unfit mother, housekeeper, sex partner and all those things that most ordinary men know how to kick around when they have gotten caught in the cookie jar of a neighbor, whether married or not...more times than not, or just plain bored and wanting new adventure...

A man who my adopted mother described as one that told his sons to distrust all women, and marry none for they were all gold diggers...yet he didn't do his fifty fifty cut deal even though she worked for many years in the mills and tobacco fields along side him and by herself with her kids when her husband was too drunk or getting ready to go out on the town, by himself and on the prowl for a better sex partner for the one at home has become someone elses mommy, not once yet several times....and he was a looking for excitement and not commitment for he had that pain in the ass at home.

A woman that her husband called a nag because she would talk to him, for in his estimation, women should be always ready to do the tango, be seen and definitely not heard, for anytime women are a talking, they aren't a discussing, and they are a arguing and thus a relationship where all talks are fights and nothing was able to be compromised or settled and so much anger that all of my adopted mother children were shell shocked from all of the yelling and screaming and to this day, all of her children would rather tell you a lie and have you happy than tell you the truth to cause a lock down, shut down, especially if they were a wanting a special favor a little while later...

A woman my former adopted mother described herself as; a cryer, worrier and a prayer...

For instead of leaving after the physical, mental and emotional abuse lesson episode she was always given over her 24 year span of time of being with a man that she believed was manic depressive from being at boot camp and having some kind of an episode or drug reaction from some vaccines he had been given by the military and was sent home and she told me that she only discovered the paper work by accident from the military and using those words in it as a way to describe his illness; when she was one day a going through the mail he told her to never touch of his...

So she instead of leaving, because of knowing of his illness and knowing that part of ones marriage vows is stated "in sickness and in health, and because of her great love for this man she loved. she loved him her whole life and accepted the treatment of abuse he felt needing to dish out to her because that is what manic depression is, all things lying down, look truly up and that is why you hurt the ones that loves you the most...because for some unknown reason one loves the wrong one and throws away the baby with the bath water...and she stayed she told me until the one that I call my moon, stars and heaven, told her it wasn't save being around dad right now...for he is angry and he is a blaming all things on you and in his not well state, he might try to hurt you so please go mommy, even though I don't want you to go, I just feel it would be safer for you to leave before he returns...

Yet before she was told by her miracle baby son of the danger that he saw building up in his dad in his misplaced anger mode, all the attacks that she had weathered with him in the past were handled by her a crying herself to sleep and a asking God/Jesus each and every time he lost the moment, to touch her husband's heart so that he would pull through this another one of his manic depressive behavior moments...and not leave as he always threatened her with and a raising her children alone for in those moments in time, he wasn't even sure in his lashing out to those that matter the most to him that these were even his own kids, for all women are nothing but trash...and no good...and that is why she told me that he told his sons that when they are young they are to have their women and when they grow old and can't get Charlie to respond to their mental and visual commands easily, they will be able to drink their whiskey...until they finally get to die and be finally in peace and quiet land.

Oh the pearls of living in an upside down world, a believing it is right side up and everybody a looking funny to you when in reality you were a looking funny and odd to them...

I told my adopted mom that I was sad that I hadn't had the chance to have met my moon, stars and heaven's dad, for until she told me of the manic depression, and I could gather some bearings on what kind of a relationship not, her son was a wanting me to be able to have and to hold along with him...on his call play...I thought her son to be my largest challenge yet...for the incorrect program he was a running through his manifesting endeavors, was a creating him to always chase the wrong tail and somehow get lost from stop to go...similar to the design his daddy left with them as well...interesting isn't it...parents as role models to their children, who would have ever thought such...hahahehehe...

Enough for now...for I am fully spent...tonight and have been since Tuesday, Michael Jackson's Memorial Day my adopted daughter's kangaroo court day...and I still don't feel that I have recovered fully yet the promedx muscadine grape extract...is certainly a helping ne tremendously...

I thank God/Jesus and Holy Spirit...for its entry into my life.

Please Be Blessed
Love, Light and Peace
Tonie

I will be back with Part 2 tomorrow...

Asian Woman Email...The Power of Forgiveness

Spiritual Ministries Mind Spirit Body Vibrational Medicine Research, Healing and Education Center.
July 11, 2009
The Setting Free of Those Things In My Psychic, Called My Imagination By Others Not Affected Or Having Experienced...
Rev. Tonie C. Wallace Dream-Founder and Director
Jada Stone Associate Director/Contributing Writer

Dear All One Family:

I am still on the rebound back from my crash and burn experience...from the totality of the episode of overwhelm, sadness and depression over realizing that I was a living in a land that couldn't love and respect all equally.

I can't remember who wrote a "land divided will never stand," all I do know is that whoever coined this expression, knew exactly what they were a talking about...

I believe that what brought forth that total explosion that rocked my world in not a good and wonderful way, was the realization that all of my life I have been treated with disrespect and made to feel less than others not like me...

So when I received this email posting from Asian Woman, today; it totally put me into synch that what happened was meant to happen! Because all of the lessons and such that were to come out of my memory recall moments, triggered by events that have transpired since last August when all close to the situation, realized the damaging effects of one lie a pumped up by the television media world that was probably host to a lot of kicked back time and soap operas reinforcement, lies, deception, greed, lust...

A child attention deficit due to mom having to work all of the time due to daddy not a paying child support.

Just going through the melodrama of the unfolding of these non justice moments re- triggered and allowed me to remember what it felt like to be be born a citizen and considered lower class, and treated less than acceptable, yet tolerable until one produced or gave them all these career moves wanted of them, and then set packing to sights they really didn't care to know and with out even a wave of the hand goodbye!

Why didn't I sue, sue, sue? Because first of all, it isn't really what God/Jesus and Holy Spirit would want of us because "vengeance is mine saith The Lord."

So I just swallowed my pride and wiped away from tears from all of the ground breaking efforts that I put forth in the area I have lived in for 20 plus years and pretended that my career unsuccessful efforts were due to my inability to produce the perfect product for them...when in reality, I was never meant to be more than the set up person and the riches from the harvest always went to someone more than myself...


So it was a natural thing that I was to fall apart when I realized that in 58 years of my life, places like Barney Fife Town Land and Justice System, still do exist..."and justice can't be heard in such a discouraging world of basing ones worth on their skin color, nationality and material holdings.

Proof to back up this statement...Please consider this thought train; of all of the people in the court room this past Tuesday, and supposedly tied in with the unalienable and undeniable rights of the innocent being upheld... don't you find it very interesting that the persons that did the best job that day, were those not being paid and participated out of their sense of caring for those involved in the case...

For they were the only ones that read all of the evidence not hidden and presented, and they were also the ones involved in checking all of the evidence presented, for the truths and contradictions and changing stories...and making notes and giving comments about the discrepancies that they saw present in the case...

Who again were those persons?
1. The Guardian Ad Liteum Volunteer -V.H.
2. The attorney for Guardian Ad Liteum Attorney out of Wadesboro.
3. Myself

Guardian Ad Liteum and CASA are similar types of non profit organizations with their greatest aim is to give the unheard involved children victims...their rights and voice...a great organization in my books! For these two above mentioned persons were the only ones that cared that innocent persons were being unjustly handled...
More later on V.H...the hero of this sad non loved by town or family story...

I found it interesting when it dawned on me that when these two interested people that went the extra mile and ended up putting themselves totally in the shoes of those on the firing line...they were the only ones to see this case more clearer than those just a barely paying attention yet telling everyone that they are the right ones...and thus no witnesses need to be called. Case closed kind of thing...

"Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit, forgive them please for they know not what they do and forgive me as well for any part I might have played unconsciously in the unfolding of these events... And as well, Please reveal to me all the lessons that are contained within its appearance, so that this lesson won't have to come around again, to those that do not believe that, "what you do to others, you do to yourself,"

Such as what You Father/Jesus ordered us to demonstrate as proof positive that we were a trying to become more Christ like...as proof of our love for You. "Your Golden Rule"

Please as well Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit, I ask that you please help me to be more able to stand up to those a calling me less than themselves and unworthy to speak, and thus unable to speak my truths when I get all of the offenders of the truth a telling me my truths mean nothing...for now I am a finding out that by keeping my truths to myself, it hasn't helped the world a bit...

"The Truth Will Set You Free," kind of thing.

For in this land that time has forgotten to check on and update FATHER...evidence in Your Children's case, that would clear the slanderous allegations-situation up in a heart beat...WERE hidden as You know and thus this curse on the land of "bearing false witness, by the prosecution team of this town for continuing the lies that first created this terrible scenario...so please Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit...help all of Your children see that we have a serious situation here and not just a story about a poor white trash American citizen a hooking up with an illegal with no rights afforded him being he illegally came to United States and is therefore far less accepted than the poor white trash American he married and has no rights what to speak of...

For I believe this is not the America that You wanted us to create for I know that You love all of Your Children equally...and all are just as important as everyone else...

Thank You Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit...please allow the truth to be heard all over the land...

All this I ask in God/Jesus and Holy Spirit's name, Amen."
Love, Light and Peace
Tonie


True Forgiveness by Lynn Woodland

Can we have love but not forgiveness?

Or true forgiveness without love?
Without forgiveness we can't love.

From the perspective of spiritual reality, the statements "I love you but don't forgive you" and "I forgive you but I don't love you" are impossibilities.

Love and forgiveness go hand in hand.

We can't have one without the other.

True forgiveness is not something we do for another person.

I often hear people speak of forgiveness as something we give to someone else, something that must be deserved or earned, and sometimes needs to be withheld.

The spiritual purpose of forgiveness is self-healing.

As long as we are holding anger, resentment and grudges against another person, we are poisoning our bodies with toxicity, lowering our immunity to disease and on subtler levels generating thoughts, expectations and attitudes that repel our highest good.

As we hold on to the belief that someone has harmed us so badly that we cannot, will not, forgive, we give power to the part of us that feels vulnerable and susceptible to being harmed.

Our lack of forgiveness actually draws more circumstances that will feed our anger and victimization.

Lack of forgiveness has been related as a contributing factor to physical illness, excess weight, financial scarcity, failed relationships and a host of other problems.

Lack of forgiveness inhibits love, which is the only true source of power.

As we withhold forgiveness, we inhibit our power and our very life-force.

Medical intuitive Caroline Myss, who, through her gift of intuitive sight sees the energy patterns that lead to illness, says, "By far the strongest poison to the human spirit is the inability to forgive oneself or another person."

Now that we have established its importance, what exactly does it mean to forgive?

What often makes forgiveness so difficult is that we tend to think of it as a sacrifice, as giving in, giving up, losing our "rightness.

" It's like giving up the chip that says

"You owe me."

It seems to discount the pain we felt.

Forgiveness is sometimes experienced as letting someone who hurt us off the hook, no longer holding them accountable for their actions.

But forgiveness is not an act of negotiation between two people.

It does not begin and end by speaking the words "I forgive you."

Instead, it is an internal state, an ongoing process rather than an act.

True forgiveness is not about excusing someone's hurtful actions.

It goes much deeper than this.

It is the inner awareness that no harm was done, thus there is, in truth, nothing to forgive.

Most of what passes for forgiveness is rooted in the belief that we are separate and vulnerable and have been harmed.

In this way, the act of forgiveness directs the attention of both people to the hurtful act.

The forgiver feels self-righteous, the forgiven, guilty.

The whole process strengthens both people's belief in the reality of separateness and harm, and in this way is disempowering to both.

True forgiveness is a shifting of attention away from the hurtful act, not in denial, but in release.

It means identifying with the higher part of ourselves that was never harmed so we can see past the illusion of separateness to the reality of Oneness.

As we understand ourselves to be one with the person who hurt us, forgiveness becomes self-forgiveness.

As we transcend our belief in ourselves as victims, we are able to see the other person differently.

Instead of seeing his or her "wrongness" we see the pain that motivated his or her actions.

Living from a belief that doing harm brings personal gain is a prison of separateness, powerlessness and pain.

Anyone who acts intentionally to harm another is trapped in this painful prison, even if he or she doesn't recognize it as such.

When we understand this, we can more easily feel compassion instead of rage.

As with the idea of "love," I have heard the concept of forgiveness promoted in spiritual, metaphysical and psychological circles for years as the spiritual thing, the healthy thing, the right thing to do.

And, as with teachings on love, I have heard much more on the benefits and reasons to do it than on how to do it.

How can we coax our hearts into forgiveness when they feel hardened or broken?

Words of forgiveness are worth nothing without truth behind them.

Let following help you find a path into the process of forgiving.

Let Go of Victim Scenarios

Write a "victim" scenario.

Describe everything that was done to you unjustly, all the ways you have been harmed, every way you are right and the other party is wrong.

Next, describe the same scenario from the perspective that it was somehow a great lesson, gift or turning point in your life that served you in some important way.

Write this even if you don't believe it.

Take the first scenario of yourself as victim and symbolically release it: burn it, tear it up, bury it or flush it.

As you let it go imagine that you are releasing the need to feel victimized.

Keep the second scenario and read it every day for at least a week.

See the Reflection of Your Core Beliefs

Instead of focusing attention on the wrong thing that has been done to you, imagine that this painful experience reflects some belief or expectation you have about life.

This doesn't mean you "asked" to be hurt.

It means that you learned, probably when you were very young, to expect painful experiences.

Release blame, shame and any idea that you have done something wrong and simply look at this situation as a mirror, giving you important information about your core beliefs.

Every day for a month, pray to God or your Higher Self for help in stepping out of the hurtful dance you have created with this other person.

Pray for help in releasing the beliefs and expectations that call hurt into your life.

If you are working on forgiving a parent or other person from your early childhood who helped to instill your limiting core beliefs about life, you can still see your experience with this person as reflecting some deep level of choice.

Imagine that your Higher Self called this relationship into your life for a purpose.

For example, if I look at all the pain my alcoholic father caused me in my childhood and early adulthood, I am tempted to feel rage and powerlessness.

However when I think of the turns my life took as a direct result of this early pain, I realize that my whole life path with its focus of love and healing was because of my father.

From this perspective, I see a higher purpose to our meeting and can actually feel gratitude for this painful experience in my life.

Get to the Root of Displaced Anger
When your anger is toward a group, an institution or society, rather than an individual, it is important to remember that anger is a much weaker power source than love.

Many feel that anger is a necessary ingredient for creating change.
While anger can motivate action, ultimately, when we give attention to victimization and abuse, we may achieve some sense of victory, but we also perpetuate a reality that includes victims and abusers.

The more we motivate ourselves from a place of anger, the more we will continually have to fight victimization.
Being angry at a group often has a feeling of hopelessness built into it.

While we may be able to create peace and resolution in relation to one person, doing so with all of society is obviously more difficult.
When we often find ourselves angry at "the system" in one form or another, there is usually a person or people from early in our lives we need to forgive.

This early hurt, usually related to one or both of our parents or other significant adult care-takers, imbedded within us feelings of anger and powerlessness that we project onto other situations in our lives.

We may also find that we have anger toward one or more of the important people in our adult life ¾ a spouse, friend or co-worker - and have displaced this anger onto an impersonal system because we fear the consequences of our anger.

It may be easier to face the anger we have toward a faceless system than to deal with the true source of our feeling, which invariably comes back to personal relationships with individuals.

However, it is far more manageable to forgive an individual than a system.

When you find yourself angry at a group, find the one individual you most need to forgive.

If, for example you are angry at a company where you used to work, focus on the one person you feel the most anger toward.

If you are angry at society or other such large institutions where there is no one single individual who stands out, then look to see who in your life you are holding anger toward.

Practice Self-forgiveness

If all approaches to forgiveness feel equally difficult, you probably have at least as much trouble forgiving yourself as you do others.

In this case, begin the forgiveness process by forgiving yourself.

Make a list of all the things you hold against yourself and begin to say out loud and as written affirmations, "I, (your name), forgive myself for ___________. "

Louise Hay suggests looking at yourself in the mirror as you say affirmations of self-love.

I find this mirror technique to be especially helpful in working on self-forgiveness.

Aim for Moments of Forgiveness
God Bless And Keep You Always...